Best Chuck Norris jokes in honor of his 80th birthday


Chuck Norris, who is now a punchline for toughness, is celebrating his 80th birthday Tuesday.

Norris is a US Air Force vet, actor, martial arts expert, film producer and a living legend for the memes made in his honor. He’s likely best known for his role on CBS’ “Walker, Texas Ranger.”

To celebrate his birthday, here are some of our favorite Chuck Norris jokes :

Chuck Norris doesn’t climb trees. He just pulls them down and walks on top of them.

Chuck Norris doesn’t actually write books. The words assemble themselves out of fear.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. He simply decides what time it is.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

When God said, ‘Let There Be LIGHT!’ Chuck said, ‘Say Please.’

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Latest stories:

Copyright 2020 Nexstar Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Utah VP Debate

More Utah Debate