Cassidy DuHadway of Purple Sky counseling is back to talk boundaries. It’s become a buzz word in times of social media, so we break down what it really means to have boundaries, and why it’s imperative to draw them.
What are boundaries?
- The personal limits, rules, and guidelines that individuals and/or families establish to protect their emotional and psychological well-being.
- lines we draw to protect our emotional and mental well-being
- Physical Boundaries
- Emotional Boundaries
- Mental Boundaries
- Social Boundaries
- Time Boundaries
- Material Boundaries
- Sexual Boundaries
- Professional Boundaries
- Digital Boundaries
- Examples
- Setting a boundary by letting your partner know you need some alone time to recharge after a long day.
- Communicating to a coworker that you’re not available to take work calls or emails after a certain time in the evening.
- Politely declining an invitation to a social event when you’re feeling overwhelmed and need some downtime.
- Letting a healthcare provider know about your preferences and limits regarding a particular medical procedure or treatment.
- Setting aside one night a week for your own thing
- lines we draw to protect our emotional and mental well-being
Why are boundaries important?
- Helps maintain your mental health
- Improve your Emotional Well-Being
- Prevent Burnout
- Increase your Healthy Relationships
- Build Self Esteem
- Type of Self-Care
- Reduces Stress
Myths
- Boundaries are selfish.
- Setting boundaries means you don’t care.
- Boundaries create conflict.
- I don’t need boundaries.
Hard Parts
- Fear of rejection.
- Guilt and anxiety.
- Consistency.
- Setting them w/ loved ones.
- Lack of support.
How to set a Boundary
- KEY – You are responsible for stating and maintaining your boundaries.
- Boundaries are not MEAN, they can be clear and kind.
- Boundaries are about letting people know how you are going to respond if they cross your set limit or guideline
- Look at your values and needs
- Identify situations
- Set consequences – Your response, not theirs
- Communicate clearly
- Be assertive and kind
- Stick to your boundary
- Reevaluate and Shift as needed
- Seek support