Dr. Alisa Van Langeveld, PhD, Adjunct Professor in Family Studies, a parenting expert, and a mom of 4, and the founder of “10 Minutes Together” online is back to discuss many ways to have a fabulous Mother’s Day.
The secret is to “know” what you want and “tell” your people.
Mother’s Day can be complicated. We hope it is a day of joyful celebration and rejuvenation, but for many women, it is a day tinged with disappointment, painful relationships, grief, and guilt.
There are many reasons why Mother’s Day can be difficult. No matter how you feel about Mother’s Day, I can share a secret to have a fabulous day.
WHY is Mother’s Day difficult?
-Disappointment – relationship with our child, partner, our mother, in-laws, past disappointments
-Grief – infertility, loss, difficult relationships
-Guilt – comparison to an idealized mother
-AND…when there is no clear way to measure success.
The “secret” to a fabulous Mother’s Day.
-“Know” what you want and “tell” your people (family, spouse, kids). There is no perfect, one-size-fits-all Mother’s Day plan. The best plan is custom-made BY you. Don’t expect anyone to read your mind. Don’t minimize other’s efforts because you asked for what you want.
Tune in – Do you even know what you want for Mother’s Day? Uncertainty means it will be really difficult for others to celebrate you and you are much more likely to be disappointed. Ask yourself – What do you want to FEEL on Mother’s Day? Rejuvenated? Appreciated? Relaxed? Celebrated? Free from responsibilities? Surrounded by family? Solitude? Entertained? Distracted? Normal?
Plan it – What activity will create that feeling? Alone time? Together time? Spa time? Outdoor time? Time for exercise, yoga, reading, meditation?Time to look at old photos? remember? Cry? Breakfast in bed? Flowers? Cards? Art projects? Jewelry? Clothes? Books? Brunch? Hike? Movie? Games? Reading? Massage? Manicure? Smash room?
Tell it. Tell your people. Tell your partner and children. Be clear. It’s ok to ask what will help you feel celebrated.
“I’m forward to Mother’s Day, What would help me feel celebrated is…”
“Mother’s Day is usually really hard for me. What would help the day feel better for me is…”
Find Dr. Alisa Van Langeveld on IG.