Do you and your partner get lost in everyday stresses of life, kids and work? Do these stresses cause you to focus less on intimacy? If so, you’re not alone.

Research shows that one in six couples let life come before their connection and may be in what experts call a “sex-starved relationship.”

But getting the passion back can not only strengthen your connection as a couple, but the journey to get there can help you figure out a lot about yourself. The process of bringing the passion back into your relationship can be broken down into 5 steps.

First, figure out what’s really going on. Why aren’t you and your partner intimate? This could be due to stress from work, kids or the hustle and bustle of life. Health also comes into play when considering the why.

Sex drive can be affected by medication, mental health and past experiences. There could be unaddressed resentment and annoyance toward your partner.

Once you’ve figured out why there’s a physical disconnect between you and your partner, the next step is to talk about it. If there’s a problem you both need to work through, communication is key.

If it’s personal, make sure your partner knows that. Just because you’re turning down sex, doesn’t mean you’re turning them down.

The third step is touch. Even if it isn’t passionate, touching whenever appropriately possible can benefit.

The fourth step is when you really start connecting again. Get the calendar out and schedule a time for you and your partner to be intimate. This is a great solution for couples with kids. While being on a schedule may be less romantic, it’s much better than not doing it at all.

And the final step, just do it! Once you and your partner have both expressed that you want to connect on an intimate level more, actions speak louder than words. Turn off the TV, put your phone down and bring the passion back!

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