The Holidays begin the busiest time of the year for wedding engagements. Robin Saville with the Utah Coalition on Marriage and Brideaccess.com to give us some tips on wedding planning.
1.) Enjoy being engaged. Remember to enjoy this journey. Kiss each other a thousand times. Take pictures of each other during the engagement. Document how you became engaged. Write down or video your story for you, family and future family. How wonderful if you could read your parents love story or your grandparents. Give that to your children and grandchildren. It also helps nurture your relationship.
2. Tell Your Parents. You should tell your parents of your impending nuptials before anyone else. (Unless of course, you are estranged.) Both of you should be present and ideally you will tell them in person - they'll have a chance to see your happiness up close, look at the rock, and start talking about the wedding. Traditionally the bride's parents know before the groom's do, but any order is really fine. Then share the news with a few close friends - the ones who are likely candidates for maid/matron of honor and best man, or definite attendants in some capacity.
3. Announce Your Engagement. There are many ways you can do this. Of course a very nice wedding invitation announcement seems to be the most formal way. But some couples make their announcement in the newspaper, online or even through social media. But for those you are inviting to the wedding, it is appropriate to send them the announcement and invite. We were recently told about a couple that at their wedding the officient said in place of You May Now Kiss the Bride...You May Now Update Your Facebook Status!
4. Set the Date. This will be the first question many people will ask. We heard a relationship expert say once that you are not officially engaged until the date is set. And couples will find it is very difficult to make any progress on planning a wedding without setting the date. You also will not be able to reserve wedding professionals without setting a date. Now how you pick a wedding date is an entirely different discussion. School, employment, holidays, themes all will influence when a couple picks their date.
5. Setting the tone and theme. What type of wedding do you want to have? Formal, casual, religious or secular? Large or intimate? Sit down together and discuss this. What are each of your expectations? Some compromise may be needed. The family dynamics may be different for both sides of the family and booth the bride and groom may have elements that will be important to them. Also, if one family is financially more capable of doing more, that family should be considerate of the other's financial limitations. Also remember, it is not her wedding or his wedding it is OUR WEDDING.
6. Keep Dating and nurturing the Relationship. This really is the most important element. Planning a wedding should never take place of nurturing the relationship. Continue to date each other. Do things for each other. And spend at least one or two days each week NOT talking about the wedding. That can be difficult but do it.
A marriage is not a wedding, a honeymoon or a 50th anniversary. IT IS A JOURNEY.
YOU CAN WATCH BRIDE ACCESS
SUNDAY MORNING ON ABC4 at 9:30a
